Monday, September 22, 2008

still cant sleep...

im still restless, i dont think im done...  

post ike, everyone has been talking on the tv and radio about getting back to a state of normalcy...  i dont think i want that...  i wasnt very happy with normal...  to be quite honest, it wasnt really working for me...  my life was pretty stagnant, so many things were falling by the wayside for me, i was taking on far more than i should, thinking that the quantity of service that i did was what mattered...  or so my actions would denote that...  

truth be told, ive been in way over my head for some time now, and i think at this very moment ive just realized that...

im a jumper... if i find something good, something that i like, something that i feel benefits me, i jump in head first...  and the freefall is beautiful, its the single most exhilirating feeling ever experienced...  until i land flat on my head...  after impact, i deal with the pain, pick up the broken pieces of what is left of myself, and trudge forward, towards the next cliff that awaits me...  

ive done this time and time again with my relationships with women, with jobs, etc...  what i never expected is that i would do the same with my relationship with God...  

but now that the honeymoon is over, what is my next step...  

for me, its re-evaluation...  i have a foundation that needs to be checked, and a place to set some strong roots...  in nervous, but at least i caught myself before impact this time...  


i think...

pray for me...

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